Three weeks ago we loaded up the "moving horse trailer" and headed West to our new/old home in San Clemente, California. There have been no shortage of tears and emotional break downs for me since that time. We have moved multiple times in our marriage and I think I counted over 20 moves to different homes since I graduated from high school (over 10 years ago), but this was by far the most difficult move for me. I am sure that having a family of five and a larger home to pack added to the difficulty, but mostly I think it has been the saying good-bye to a place and a community of friends that I have grown to love like no other place or people in my adult life.
I have thought often of Abraham and Sarah moving to a land they did not know; it was not just Abraham that had the faith to move, but Sarah left her family and friends too and went along. We don't here much about her response in the book of Genesis, but in 1 Peter 3, we are told of her faith in the Lord to follow Abraham (thus following the Lord). Today I prayed that the Holy Spirit would teach me the fear of the Lord; that the hosts of heaven would say of me that I am a woman that fears the Lord. I want to tremble at the reality that I will stand before the God of Heaven, the Lion of Judah, and give an account of how I have lived my life. I want to give the cup of cold water (or apple juice) to the least of these (my children) as unto Jesus. I am aware of how far I am from this place and how desperately I need a transforming work and empowerment each day to walk this out in a pleasing way before the Lord.
I was given an image in prayer today of the stench of sacrafices to false idols that rises up from our city. Saturday night in his dreams, all night, Dave heard the chorus from a Jason Upton song, "Better trash our idols if we're gonna be in the army of the Lord . . . " As I work on settling into my home here, I am asking the Lord, what are my idols? What are the things I worship and have become bound to? Am I worshipping the created image or the Creator? Security? Comfort? Food? Pleasure? Play? Beauty?
I miss the constant challenge to go harder after the Lord that living in Kansas City amongst such amazing women and men of God brought me. I pray for more of the Holy Spirit to help Dave and I set the pace amongst the people we are called to lead here. I feel the call to fast and pray in a new way--a desperation for it. We have left the nest and are learning to fly on our own. It is a scary thing, but glorious because of the Lord doesn't enable us, it will not be done--there is no doing this on our own.
Today, I am still unpacking and trying to figure out where to put everything. I am trying to find peace in the midst of chaos. I am trying to set my heart on being thankful for our home and situation rather than complaining about it.
I have thought often of Abraham and Sarah moving to a land they did not know; it was not just Abraham that had the faith to move, but Sarah left her family and friends too and went along. We don't here much about her response in the book of Genesis, but in 1 Peter 3, we are told of her faith in the Lord to follow Abraham (thus following the Lord). Today I prayed that the Holy Spirit would teach me the fear of the Lord; that the hosts of heaven would say of me that I am a woman that fears the Lord. I want to tremble at the reality that I will stand before the God of Heaven, the Lion of Judah, and give an account of how I have lived my life. I want to give the cup of cold water (or apple juice) to the least of these (my children) as unto Jesus. I am aware of how far I am from this place and how desperately I need a transforming work and empowerment each day to walk this out in a pleasing way before the Lord.
I was given an image in prayer today of the stench of sacrafices to false idols that rises up from our city. Saturday night in his dreams, all night, Dave heard the chorus from a Jason Upton song, "Better trash our idols if we're gonna be in the army of the Lord . . . " As I work on settling into my home here, I am asking the Lord, what are my idols? What are the things I worship and have become bound to? Am I worshipping the created image or the Creator? Security? Comfort? Food? Pleasure? Play? Beauty?
I miss the constant challenge to go harder after the Lord that living in Kansas City amongst such amazing women and men of God brought me. I pray for more of the Holy Spirit to help Dave and I set the pace amongst the people we are called to lead here. I feel the call to fast and pray in a new way--a desperation for it. We have left the nest and are learning to fly on our own. It is a scary thing, but glorious because of the Lord doesn't enable us, it will not be done--there is no doing this on our own.
Today, I am still unpacking and trying to figure out where to put everything. I am trying to find peace in the midst of chaos. I am trying to set my heart on being thankful for our home and situation rather than complaining about it.
I love you, Julia, and I am SO proud to know you and watch you move forward in your destiny as a mother, wife and lover of God. Listening to your heart gives me courage to go and do likewise (go where and do exactly what, we still do not know - but I am thankful to have you as a forerunner to look to when my time comes).
ReplyDeleteThe Lord has us all on a journey of faith...I took a pregnancy test today. Negative, but the Lord is readying my heart for still another baby possibly very soon. Trusting the Lord - what an unspeakably difficult yet joyously wonderful calling on our lives! We miss you here, and I've got your prayer rock for this week :) Love, Song
I am so glad you on are on the blog squad! ;) love you Julia!
ReplyDeleteLove ya Jules, I enjoyed reading your blog--keep posting. Call me sometime, I'd love to talk soon.
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